When we last left, I was finally tested after ruling out several other possibilities (strep throat, cigars, measles, malaria, the flu, sports with no fans in the seats, election weary syndrome...). The doctor said I'd get a call within three days. I got a call within three hours.
The Result - after chasing the doctor back and forth via phone tag, I finally got his office. "Let's see, you've tested positive." Okay, I asked, what does that mean? "Quarantine and quarantine within your house. Go to the CDC website and follow their instructions. Call us if you have trouble breathing. Thank you. God bless. Bye-bye."
I told a friend of mine about this valuable feedback, and he laughed. "I don't have COVID. If I have trouble breathing, I'm calling him anyway!" Isn't that the truth? Back to the doctor. What about exercise? Can I walk or jog? I continued. "Listen to your body," the doctor said, "But if you go outside, avoid contact with people." No kidding. Diet? Eat normally, drink a lot of water. Anything to avoid? Alcohol or such? "Listen to your body," was the reply again.
My body, the one I'm supposed to listen to, is 60. It's been around the block on so many occasions that I'm expanding the metaphor to "been around the state." (Texas of course) This body has seen its share of fun as in play, workouts, and demanding physical activity (known to some of us as work), but it has also been sedentary. Desk job. Meetings (some I called - always short, and some others called - always long). Snacking during the day. Too much coffee or cokes. Then there are the adult pleasures of life - food, beer, wine, bourbon and fine cigars. In short, you want me to listen to this body? This body put up a white flag a long time ago.
The fact of the matter is there is no fact of the matter. What you learn from testing positive from COVID is that in spite of all the Facebook expertise, what I sensed all along is solid: We don't know what we don't know. "The president should do something." They don't really know what to do right now. Science is learning on the fly, so what does the president say pray tell? "Go to the CDC website," is the mantra in the medical field. The CDC website is fairly easy to navigate, but to read it is to think you're reading about any common malady. First are the symptoms. Symptoms narrowed down my concern to five illnesses I've had from sinus infection to the flu and all points in between that have similar symptoms. Treating the illness is just as generic. Treatments ranged from staying home, to taking Tylenol for fever to drinking plenty of water and eating as necessary. I might as well have strep throat or the flu because the treatments are the same.
This is a grump's paradise, and I've got one ticket. The biggest aggravation with testing positive is people. You are treated as a novelty for having novel CV 19. Then there are the well-meaning experts, none in the field of viral studies (science) or MDs. Doctors, in fact, are just as mystified with the "what to do?" as the average guy. Everyone wants to know what it was like, as though I just came back from being beamed up and visited an alien ship. Everyone wants to tell you what you do at which step. The one piece of advice I heeded was from my mom, long passed, when I decided to eat chicken noodle soup throughout my quarantine because it was a cure for everything according to her. In this case, I would listen to her and take daily doses.
There are the "told-you-so" crowd too. "All you've done is gripe about masks. You never liked wearing masks, and now you've learned." I wore masks. I just don't like being told you have to. "You ignored the warnings and got out in the midst of crowds." I was never in a crowd, and when I was in the midst of people, they were people who all were checked negative with existing symptoms routinely. I stayed six feet away if I could, and I wore a mask.
But still the novice advice keeps coming in from people who, if I weren't a grump, I'd say were well-intended, but since I am a grump, I'll say they just want to put their nose in your business - distance from quarantine or no. "Your eyes are puffy," one will say. My dad's eyes had bags the size of suitcases from about 50 on in life. "You sound stopped up," I'll hear from another. It's called allergies. "How did you feel?" someone will ask. Like anyone else in West Texas in the fall when the farmers are stripping cotton and cold fronts begin rolling through.
Well, it's time to land this plane, but I could rant forever on this one. You want to blame someone, blame the fact we've finally been hit with something our parents and their parents dealt with well before we got here, and they needed no coaching from the cheap seats, namely politicians (and had no Facebook, let alone Google or even internet for that matter). Counties quarantined during things like the scarlet fever. Parents kept kids away from groups when polio broke out in the summers. Parents, like mine, kept me away from folks and I still got the measles, but now, we want answers (we want the truth!). My parents also used home remedies and talked to other parents for what they used that may have worked. We kept a moderately clean house, but we didn't fumigate and sanitize, nor did we hoard because others may have been in need.
Now? We want to hide, save ourselves from a very mild, for most folks including me, virus. We don't want to be told it is a very mild, for most folks, virus because your level of concern, maybe even fear, has to be subservient to mine. And if you needed toilet paper, we just bought the last pallet at Sam's which should last until 2025.
That'll all I've got to say about that...for now.
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